This time around this it is not about confrontation and fighting, but about calm and peace.
My post ‘Like Father Like Son: Elopement’ is about my son #2 eloping and becoming married. In that post I mention my son #3 is getting married in the future. The future is upon us – this coming weekend to be exact. I spoke with my son #3 this past weekend a week before his wedding and he is excited as I am also. He met his future bride over a year ago and when he told me he was seeing someone I was quite surprised. You see, in my eyes he never seemed interested in dating or having someone in his life. In school, he was a good student and started working for a restaurant bussing tables and today works for the same restaurant as the general manager. But there was never a girlfriend (that I knew of) and no dating – I just figured he was one of those guys not interested in having someone in his life.
I met my future daughter in-law about a year ago at a family reunion we had to celebrate my dad’s 80th birthday. Many of us gathered and rented cabins and spent a couple of days together and everyone had a great time. My son #3 and his girlfriend, you could tell, were very much in love – I believe this was each their first love. They walked around and held hands and it was odd in a way as I had never seen him with anyone before. But they were in love and it showed.
February 14th the question was asked and the answer was ‘yes’. The date was set and this weekend the date of marriage will occur. During the past 7 months since the announcement, I have spoken with my son #3 on several occasions. In years past when calling my sons, they usually never answer the phone, I would leave a message and sometimes would get a call back or a text. When I did finally speak with my sons, I always ended the conversation with “I love you” and received the same automatic response back. But in the past 7 months, when calling son #3, he would answer the phone each time – this is different! And also different were our conversations; closer, more personal and meaningful.
I think with the future marriage some growing is taking place with him – maybe he is gaining some insight into important aspects of life. Whatever the change, I like it because I feel closer to him than I ever have.
This past weekend I spoke with my son #3 a week before his marriage; we chatted some and when ending the conversation – ‘He started it’ before I could – He said “I love you dad” and this time I responded back “I love you too son.”
My son started it – he said it first – I am calm and peaceful as a result of it – sometimes the little differences have a big effect.