Queer, Geek, Gay

In my post ‘Easy to Label, Easy to Judge‘, I wrote the following –

So the phrase ‘Don’t judge a book by its cover’ is such an easy phrase, but difficult to abide by.  Why is this?  I remember in high school labeling other students.  You had the ‘jocks’, the ‘socialites’, the ‘nerds’, and the ‘band queers’ to name a few.  Not sure what labels are used today in high school, but in society we have labels such as ‘losers’, ‘the 1%’, ‘slut’, ‘retard’, ‘homo’, ‘illegal aliens’  you get the idea.

In today’s post, I write the following –

In school I was labeled ‘band queer’, but was I really?

urbandictionary.com has the following –

Band Queer – a band nerd from the 70’s who wore high pants, big glasses, and blue buttoned-up band sweaters to match other nerds.

-“did you see that one nerdy kid with the clarinet? his outfit is revolting!”

-“yeah, i heard he was a band queer.”

band queer – a member of a band who is so devoted to their trade that it will dominate all parts of their life, making them socially unacceptable. Later in life they will have no career other than teaching future band queers.

Mr. Donello over there was a band queer when he was a kid. Now he teaches music class.

In school I was labeled ‘geek’, but was I really?

urbandictionary.com has the following –

geek – The people you pick on in high school and wind up working for as an adult

-The geeky kid now owns a million dollar software company

Geek – Not to be confused with Nerd. A geek does not have to be smart, a Geek is someone who is generaly not athletic, and enjoys Video Games; Comic Books; being on the internet, and etc.

-Only a geek would waste their time on the internet, defining geek on urbandictionary.com

In today’s society, I am labeled ‘gay’, but am I really?

urbandictionary.com has the following –

gay – happy. joyful. gleeful.

-‘we’ll have a gay old time’.

-The Flintstone’s theme song

I don’t fit these labels, I never have and I never will, so why were they given to me?

Yes, I was in band for several school years, and at one time I may have worn big glasses, but not high pants.  During my 7th & 8th grade years the blue buttoned-up band sweaters were actually green and yes I did match the other band members.  I should have never received this label – it created judgement.

Yes, I was not very smart in school and was not athletic and I do like being on the internet, and at one time I did play video games.  I never did really enjoy comic books, and I do not own a million dollar software company; but I did retire at an early age.  I should have never received this label – it created judgement.

Yes, there are times in my life that I was and am happy, joyful and gleeful, but not always having a gay old time?  I should not receive this label – it creates judgement.

45 thoughts on “Queer, Geek, Gay

  1. Prejudices and labelling are awful, just as mobbing is – I think everyone gets his or her share, well, I definitely did. The sad truth is people will never let go of it, some of them simply enjoy it too much, although I really don´t know why 😦

    Liked by 2 people

    • I guess it will always be this way, maybe it is related to security of the people that label others that belittle the other person. I really do not know, it is a question with no one answer, I guess. Thanks Sarah for the comment, happy day my friend. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • It rather is without solution, I guess. But I won´t give up hope that somehow we can achieve a change in things by not giving up, holding our principles up high, be friendly or at least polite to other people… Of course, that in itself is quite a tiring process, and there are many a day when I´m less friendly than I should or could be, but all in all I think it will be well worth the effort 🙂
        Have a happy day and a lovely weekend ahead, Terry! 🙂 xoxo

        Liked by 2 people

  2. Sadly to end the trend of labelling, profiling (another label for an unsavory act of categorizing people – particularly by law enforcement — did I just stereotype!!? :O ) or bullying or whatever they call it currently – you’d have to tear it all down and start again. Make sure that in your new world nobody ever thought about differences and therefore didn’t develop prejudice. Me? I’m the product of generations of people who had certain bigotries built in – because they were persecuted themselves and grew to hate their tormentors. Because they were many times very poorly educated and a lot of the time isolated and the communities in which they were raised were insular and prejudice. And. The most loving and accepting person I ever knew was my father (yeah, yeah …rose colored glasses? Not in my example). He really did accept any person, never judged them on any ‘difference’ and genuinely tried to help them if they needed it. But. He was persecuted as a young child – because he had polio and rubella (simultaneously) and survived that – but was physically diminished. His own family labelled him ‘retarded’ (not so, his cognitive function was very high), ‘weak’ (not so, he worked until a year before his death and he never ever stopped trying new things), ‘slow’ – physically he was. In no other way. I think this changed his perspective. And I wish I were as strong and smart and kind as my father.

    Liked by 2 people

    • My grandmother sounds like your father, never judged, never labeled and treated everyone equally. It saddens me, we label for the reason of making someone else lower, less than ourselves. And a certain label places me in a group that I am not always comfortable being in. Thanks for your comment, always appreciated.


  3. The only labels needed in life are the one’s on the packages and cans of food we purchase. Other than that they serve no constructive purpose. It is the 21st century, men should be beyond the judgemental stage by now. When are we going to evolve. Be well. Good post.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Terry, I do not understand and never have, why people do that. Why do people want to cause hurt, it is so unnecessary. It seems like it still continues today …It really is so sad.
    Hope your day is wonderful. x

    Liked by 2 people

    • I agree with you Lynne, it is hurtful and not needed. I have no answer for why it continues to exist – this is a difficult topic. Appreciate your comment as always, the day is wonderful for me and hoping the same for you. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I can identify with the labeling. Despite still being a virgin, some of the boys at school called me nympho. Still not quite sure why but I was pretty and dated guys – is that enough? I was in the glee club (music/drama) and streamed for high achievers so I can only imagine the names I might have been called. When I was overweight I heard some nasty giggles and comments then when I was slim everyone kept telling me to to put on weight. Sigh! It’s just a form of bullying that seems less consequential but one friend’s comment about my fat nose made me hate it for years until I could finally see it was cute. You are my friend and I am yours – that’s all that matters.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. It’s an age old thing Terry. People like to put a label on things so they know where they stand with it. I was labelled “the fat bloke” for years and I am now just awaiting my new label of “he used to be the fat bloke” to start coming through. It is generally just life and that is unfortunate that people feel they need to label such pointless things.
    We should be more reactive to how someone is towards us rather than what we think of them without first discovering them.
    Anyway, I am tired so probably not making much sense!

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Some people put others down because that’s the only way they know how to put themselves up. They are the ones in the pathetic side, not the one being labeled. Mercy to those people with such rotten attitude.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Labels….I believe its what kids give to other kids they cannot relate to…fear of the unknown….I was always labeled a stoner….loner….hippy…..was I always stoned…nope…rarely in fact…alone….preferred it to being apart of the crazies I went to school with…LOL and hippy…always, but not the dirty kind…more of an earth mother….labels…hate them….kat

    Liked by 1 person

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