In my post ‘not many handshakes going on these days.‘, I concluded with the following –
Today, I hug and kiss my dad always without hesitation and the response is welcomed. I do not kiss my brothers, but we do hug now – not many handshakes going on these days.
The first hug and kiss to my dad – I remember that day as if it were yesterday.
In today’s post I begin with the following –
Today is my oldest brother’s birthday; he reaches 61 years today. I have written very little about my twin sister and almost nothing about my brothers. It is not that they are not important; it is I feel they do not necessarily play an important role in my life, the history of me, the current me, that which is me and is my life.
As mentioned in the above post, I do not kiss my brothers, but we do hug now – not many handshakes going on these days.
Recently, well these past several months; the relationship with my brothers has changed some. Before Gary and I left Dallas last month, we had dinner with family including my oldest brother, the birthday brother. As we ended our gathering, he asked about me and my condition and the expectations for the future. I provided him the information I knew at that point, which did not include the chemotherapy that I am now undertaking. At that time departing from dinner, he gave me a brotherly hug and said, I love you! First time for my oldest brother to speak those words to me.
Since that night, there was another conversation on the phone and the same words were spoken to end the discussion.
I have always embraced compassion, love and expression. Each one of these aspects of us is important, not just for us, but to others also. My dad and brothers not always easy for them, are coming around to embrace these same aspects. I believe it is never too late to express the importance of compassion, love and expression.
There is the other brother; another older sibling, the one for which him and I have had basically a non-existent relationship for most of our lives. We are different, or so we thought until much later in life, that life in times that is now. We rarely speak on the phone and actually see each other in person less often, very seldom and more often rarely. We have had a couple of phone conversations in the past month, and spoke more to each other than we have in the past 5 years.
Last week, we ended our phone conversation and before we disconnected, there was a pause, nothing spoken, just a pause. I felt him and I wanted to say something more, to end the conversation differently than we always have. The time was not right, not yet, but it may be the next time it will be.
The years preceding today, for the brothers, it was not always easy to embrace compassion, love and expression.
They are changing – what a nice birthday present for us all.
Happy Birthday Brothers.