It was a strange goodbye

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It was a strange goodbye.

November 4th was the day I said ‘goodbye’.  Maybe I should have said ‘Until we meet again.’

It was a strange goodbye.

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Those I left were helpful, hopeful, caring, compassionate and wishing me well.

Now a week later and I do not know the results of that strange goodbye.  Would it be forever; with those that were there for me?

Will there be others that take their place and be there for me once again?

It was a strange goodbye.

I left, thanking them for their time, their compassion and their service to me and others.  For they are champions in my mind and I am thankful for them.

Will I ever see them again, has my time ran out or is it time to move on to others?

It was a strange goodbye.

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I will miss them, but not necessarily the time spent with them.  How could I feel this way?

How could I know them and visit them for weeks that went into months: then just to leave, never to return?  How could I do this to them?  They are my champions, my heroes and I leave them; forever?

It was a strange goodbye.

November 4th was the last day I received chemotherapy.  It was the last day I would spend time with those dedicated to helping others; helping me.

These women and men who have skills in treating us who have cancer are now out of my life.

It was a strange goodbye.

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I thanked them for helping me, caring for me and for their compassion for me and others.

I told them in an odd way, I would miss them.

It was a strange goodbye.

54 thoughts on “It was a strange goodbye”

  1. It is really weird Terry to say goodbye to those that helped. It is happy to leave and move forward but you feel a loss. My daughter was very ill and they were just amazing. So, I felt so strange saying goodbye after several months of hospital stays and surgery etc. That was 25 years ago now. I still remember them and how they helped me through a rough rough time. Here is to a goodbye that leaves you healthy and well.xxx

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  2. I really don’t know how to respond to this post but my heart goes out to you. And I pray for you that you will receive strength and healing in your body. May you find new joys and happiness.

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  4. A sad and happy post. I understand. My daughter spent 175 days in the hospital and Dr’s offices her first year of life. After her 3rd surgery, her last for then, I felt relief and sadness that these people who we had come close to and knew all about what was going on in our life were suddenly gone. I was happy, apprehensive that we may be back sooner than I ever wanted to be and sadness these “friends” were gone.

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    • These friends we eventually say goodbye to played an important role in our lives for a short period. Thanks dear, I know you are taking a few days off – enjoy, be safe – I appreciate you! 🙂

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  5. When I was working in medical facilities, I always said, hope I don’t see you back here again, but hope we run into each other in the grocery store….the patients always agreed….good bye, but see you around….I am sure they will miss your smiling, positive, attitude you brought to there day….but are hoping they don’t see you in there again…..always hard to say good bye to those who helped you through a rough time in your life….have a wonderful weekend…we have wind here…sunny, but wind…xxxxxkat

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    • And I will miss their smiling, positive attitude also – and them treating me with so much respect – a great group of people. Hopefully the wind does not blow you away – we are having beautiful weather here – all is good kat. 🙂

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  6. I look at it as See You and Thank You SO Much Terry- hopefully not to return for additional chemo in the near future. They see many patients in and out-its their job to be compassionate, knowledgeable, helpful and kind while administering these helpful drugs to their patients. They did their job you did yours, right? On to the next step of recovery. Sunshine Hugs.

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  7. Maybe I can speak from the other side, having been a medic and then a caregiver for my friend who died from a glioblastoma multiforme 4 brain tumor.
    “Goodbyes” are almost impossibly difficult, but know this. They do their jobs and they do them every single day. You’d be amazed at how it makes them feel to know that their kindness and dedication makes a difference.
    They are rarely celebrated but they do what they do for a reason…not for glory or accolades…but simply because they want to make a difference.
    My friend was not going to be saved. He knew it and I knew it and his family knew it but I made a difference.
    My friend never thanked me. He didn’t tell me goodbye. He didn’t say until we meet again. He was too sick…but how I wish he could have said “see ya. I won’t be needing you anymore.”
    THOSE are the sweetest words you can ever hear and we can ever say.

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    • They certainly do make a difference Laurel – and an important impact! It takes special people to be in a role of helping others during difficult times – thank you and others for being special! Happy Saturday! 🙂

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  8. You can always revisit..from time to time..
    send a card or two…
    maybe a fruit 🍉 bouquet 💐..

    But… I’m so glad 😁 you got through this series of chemo..

    I know it was the best experience..
    but thanks to Those awesome nurses who caring and compassionate attitude makes it easier to endure

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  9. Yes, it must have been a strange ‘good-bye’, the dedicated medical staff had been part of your life, for months and that hospital became ‘a part of your life’. As much as I am sure the medical staff were sad to see you go, I am sure they were happy that your Chemo had now ended and hoped for a better future for you, as they do for all their patients. Keep well my friend, and enjoy the weekend further. 🙂

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  11. I am sure it was weird, but how oh so wonderful. I am certain they understand and are very special people to be able to do that. you look wonderful Terry! Keep smiling. It is beautiful. ❤

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  14. As a former nurse, I can assure you the medical staff understand those strange goodbyes. I hugged many patients that I adored, yet I was glad to see them go in a bittersweet kind of way – it meant they were well again!! Those goodbyes really are strange!

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  15. You are looking very well for someone who has had chemotherapy so that is a good sign that you are strong. It is a strange relationship we have with our medical carers. I am very fond of my psychiatrist and would miss him tremendously but wish I didn’t have to see one. I made them open up the Cathedral in Tulsa just for me (so kind of them), so those candles better bloody work! 😇😍

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  16. The healthcare field certainly is strange when it comes to good byes. You spend sometimes months together, getting to know each other, all the while caring for you. Then one day you are either up and pronounced well enough to leave or your treatment is over. But then they must make room for more like you and focus their attention on that person. Indeed a strange good bye. I do wish you health and happiness Terry!!!

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  17. It is very strange saying goodbye to those that have been caring for us – not knowing if you will see them again, knowing that they will hope not and that in reality that is what you do to but yet you are attached to them. And knowing that they are straight away going to care for someone else, slot someone else in. I just hope so hard and loud that you will not need to have further chemotherapy and I think those loud hopeful thoughts constantly for you. 🙏🏼

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    • Yep, it is interesting the feelings after spending a significant time with those caring for us. They were in my life for an important reason, and then they move on to others that need them. Thanks Bernadette. 🙂

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  20. I think they will probably feel exactly the same, missing you but also not wanting you to need to come back and wishing you well for the future. It´s always a weird situation to find oneself in, and I´m sure you managed it perfectly, Terry 🙂 xxxxxx

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