It feels like a dream

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It feels like a dream

This reality of mine

For it seems only yesterday

My days were always full of sunshine

 

Now no matter the day

With the sunshine or none

I wake every morning

Waiting for the day to be done

 

For each passing day

Takes me closer to it

That all important day

When my breath is ready to quit

 

Each day becomes difficult

Some a little, some a lot

This is not what I envisioned

This is not what I had thought

 

It feels like a dream

This reality of mine

The daily pains, the daily struggles

It must be a sign

 

This body of mine

The look and the feel

My cancer in my body

It all seems unreal

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67 thoughts on “It feels like a dream”

  4. Your words are still so strong and resonant, so full of emotion, so poignant, so affecting. Beyond all that your Cancer has taken from you, it has not taken the remarkable spirit that you keep inside. And when that day comes, that day that is not so long, then that same outstanding spirit will lift from your cancer-worn body and will fly to take its rightful place as the brightest of stars shining down. This I know. Because, if you remember, I have special powers 🙂

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  10. Dear Terry, your beautiful, heart-wrenching poem reminded me of a very wise woman who lived about 2,000 years ago. Her name was Bruria, and she and her husband Rabbi Meir had only two children, two precious sons. A truly terrible thing happened one day when both boys fell asleep and never woke up – they died in their sleep! When Rabbi Meir came home, Bruria asked him,- “What would you do if a friend gave two precious diamonds into your keeping and then came to collect them?” “I’d give them back, of course, – said Rabbi Meir, – and thank him for letting me admire them while they were in my hands.”
    “These are your precious diamonds, – said Bruria, as she led her husband to the bodies of their sons, – He had given them into our keeping and let us admire them, and now He had taken them back.”
    Your shining soul, Terry, your gift of courage and resilience undaunted by the devastating disease, is a precious diamond given to all of us, your friends who love you! We cherish every moment you spend with us, and every word from you enriches our lives!
    Prayers and blessings sent your way!

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  11. Love, love and more love heading your way, #1. I am astonished that you are still able to blog but perhaps it is a deep need to keep communicating with everyone. Your passion makes me feel that I can strive more. Kisses, sweet dreams and a Bosie (a special Scottish hug from someone like your grandma who clasps you close to their bosom).

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  15. Dear Terry, At the precise time you were posting this, my back was seizing up by the side of a canal when I had attempted to walk further than my body would allow. I was wondering how on earth I would make it back to the car when I looked up and saw on a ledge a small rock painted with the words: ‘Staffs Smilesstones, please put a photo on FB and rehide’ with the name of the family who had put it there. It did indeed make me smile, it was such a surprise, sitting there at my eyeline, waiting for me to look up and smile. This smile and its subsequent break into laughter helped me relax enough to make it to where I needed to go. When I got back home, I looked up Staffs Smilestones and they have a page on Facebook, full of young children with painted stones and cute smiles, finding and hiding them all over Staffordshire. I am sitting here with a heat pad on my back about to go to bed, but wanted to share this story with you. Goodnight, dear Terry, I hope you get some rest. 💜

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  18. Oh my dear friend…you have never stopped looking forward to what is to come….I am sorry that your days seem long now….when the day comes and your free of your pain….I want you to know that when I look up at the moon and you will be able to see me, I will be the one twirling and blowing you kisses…..my friend…I have so enjoyed being part of your blogging world and just want to say how much you have touched me, your spirit, your strength, you love, your coping ability to handle what has been given to you wanted or not…..you have made me a better, stronger person Terry…Thank you for that…..until then….let the moon beams wash over you bringing you love and know that your in my heart, even though we have never had the chance meet, I have met you, through your words, your stories, your pictures….you and Gary are special….xxxxxxxxxxxxxhot tears my friend, hot tears….kat

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  21. Such a beautiful poem. Terry, many many hugs from the other side of the Atlantic. I hope you can feel all my appreciation from a little island in the Mediterranean. That’s how far you have touched people with your generosity and kindness. Keep strong my friend xx

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  25. Beautifully honest poem. I thought of you the other day- we were driving through steady rain with the occasional break in the clouds. Completely unexpectedly a rainbow formed, then quickly faded. Around another bend, another formed, larger, but again quickly disappeared. This happened 4 times all together, until the most perfect rainbow formed, shooting out from the fluffiest, whitest cloud, and diving straight into the sea. It was glorious and made me think of you… strong and beautiful rising out of a gloomy gray day. 🌈 ☁️ 🌈

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