St. Pete

2 Months ago, back before my pain became unbearable, Gary and I were out and about some.

We were getting out a little to explore the surrounding area of our new location.

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Now my body is not allowing me to go out and find new areas to discover.

But 2 months ago, we drove not far from the MacDill Airforce Base and parked to take a walk.

Our destination was Saint Petersburg (St. Pete).  And as luck would have it, we went on the day the city was having their annual Mainsail Art Festival.

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I wanted to share some pictures with you of our walk that day.

My Day

OMG!

What a wonderful day!

I write posts in advance, and this was not my original post.  Instead at the last minute, I had to come up with a new post.

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Image Provided by: tnriverboat.com

It is Father’s Day.

You just made My Day!

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To be continued………

I disabled comments again today for specific reasons I will explain later.  Expect a post in a few days that will be a continuation from this one.

Thank you everyone – and Happy Father’s Day!

$3.50

I have mentioned in several previous posts I had a recent consultation appointment with a Radiation Oncologist at Moffitt Cancer Center.  Dr. M. indicates receiving radiation would be a benefit for me prior to the next set of treatments to take place.

What does $3.50 have to do with my health and cancer treatments?  Nothing.

Except, following the visit with my Radiation Oncologist Dr. M., Gary and I needed to make a stop by a bank.

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Image Provided by: Waverly Place

The bank’s location was in a small shopping plaza and I spotted a Gigi’s Cupcakes shop.  I have never had a Gigi cupcake but had heard they were delicious; I also knew they were most likely expensive as well.

Let me provide you some information.  Gary and I are both retired and we can survive the rest of our lives without the worry of money.  Well Gary being a former comptroller and numbers guy, he counts his pennies.  And that is okay to a certain point.  Over the years, I have learned from him and he has learned from me when comes to matters of money.  But, recent events, specifically my health situation has me changing a little bit when it comes to spending money.

There would have been a time, I would not have paid $3.50 for one cupcake, why would I, when I can get them cheaper at the local grocery store.

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Image Provided by: Chicago Tribune

Life is short and on that particular day upon the completion of my appointment with Dr. M., for the first time in a long time I felt a sense of hope; something good in the future that I could look forward to.

I have lost 38lbs. in the last 4 months and I have no idea how long I will be here on this earth.  I might be here for a short couple of years or I may be for another 40+ years.  Because of my health situation and my weight loss and a day where I felt a little celebration was due – I spent $3.50 on one cupcake.

Naturally I gobbled it up without taking a picture of the actual cupcake, I remember it had lots of chocolate, chocolate cake with chocolate icing and chocolate sprinkles on top.  I could not resist the temptation, it was eaten quickly; though I did take a picture of the box it was in.

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My health situation has me changing a little bit when it comes to spending money.  Every once in a while, I spend a little extra money on me and splurge occasionally.

Thank you, Gigi’s Cupcakes, for the excellent cupcake that day, for me it was worth every penny – all 3 hundred and 50 of them.

listening to my 70’s

The MacDill Air Force Base has an excellent gym that includes 2 outdoor tracks.  When I am feeling up to it and my body allows, I make a trip to the gym to walk the track.  My usual length to walk is 1 ½ miles.  And if my back allows, I will sometimes push it to 2 miles.  Even though I am walking around a track and seeing the same views, I do enjoy the outside.  With the warmth of the sunshine and the breeze of the wind, I feel good.  What makes the walking even better is listening to my music.  The earplugs are in and you know I am listening to my 70’s music.

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The beats of the music back in that decade took me through puberty, from a 10-year-old kid to a 20-year-old young man. That decade many things were taking place good and bad; but the music helped me get through it all.

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Thank you to artist such as Blonde, John Denver, The Bee Gees, Elton John, ABBA, Queen, Donna Summer, Roberta Flack, The Jackson 5, Diana Ross, Olivia Newton-John and so many, many more.

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Those artists I still listen to today and are they are still here for me today, helping me to keep moving; lifting my spirits and taking me to a different time when life seemed so effortless and easy, fun, crazy with no worries.

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This current decade many things have taken place good and bad: and this music continued to help me get through it all.

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So, there I am walking my 1 ½ miles and sometimes pushing 2 miles, listening and being taken away for a little while to another time.

Carnival

Recently the MacDill Air Force Base had a carnival with free rides.  I went only on two of the rides because I easily get motion sickness and plus with my pain, it was not a good idea to ride some of the faster ones.  But Gary did; he went on many of them.

In this video, all the red roof buildings are on the MacDill Air Force Base.  There is much more to the Air Force Base than what this video displays; it is a large base.  Later in the video you see the skyline of Tampa in the distance and smoke.  The smoke is from one of the many wildfires that have been recently occurring here in Florida.

I hope you enjoy the video –

I had a bad day

This past Sunday, I had a bad day

My pain this past weekend was at its greatest and many pain pills were taken

I was tired, down, a little depressed and cried a lot

It started this past Saturday

This past Sunday, I had a bad day

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This past Sunday –

Someone said that when they take their last breath, which they indicated would be many years from now; they would be happy because they accomplished something

A couple became married

I watched as young women and men performed their military PT (Physical Training) in the morning from the window of my RV

I observed people enjoying life and having fun

This past Sunday, I had a bad day

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Image Provided by: VideoHive

I was asked the other day by someone, you seem unhappy

I responded I am unhappy

I am unhappy because I have Stage 4 Bladder Cancer

I am unhappy because I am going through chemotherapy

I am unhappy because I have a bag attached to the side of my body

I am unhappy because I have lost 30 pounds of body weight

I am unhappy because I have major chronic pain

I am unhappy because I wake in the mornings with pain

I am unhappy because I go to bed at night with pain

I am unhappy because I am not enjoying life

I am unhappy because Gary is not enjoying life

I am unhappy because I cannot plan for the future

I am unhappy because I wait and wait for a time to take tests that will determine my future

I am unhappy because many other people are enjoying life

I many times in posts, comments and videos use the phrase ‘Happy Day’

I was not having a happy day

This past Sunday, I had a bad day

find the humor

Who knows Brian from Bonnywood Manor?

If you have not visited his blog, please do so – you will not be disappointed.

So, why am I mentioning Brian and his blog in this post?  Well you see, I leave comments on other’s blog posts and I truly appreciate the communication that takes place with these comments and the comments left on my blog posts.  I do not always leave a comment, but many times I do.  There was a post Brian published titled ’10 More Signs That Your Body Just Isn’t What It Used To Be’.

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I read this post and could relate to it, so I left the following comment –

LOL, so very funny & true. I can relate to many of these Brian.

Brian responded with this comment –

Terry, I honestly hesitated before posting this, wondering if you might find it a bit offensive that I would be whining about such things when you have a much more challenging situation, but I knew in the end you would be fine with it. We’re both here to help others get through the bigs and the smalls by trying to find the humor and the shared humanity in both. Hope you’re doing well…

I responded with the following comment –

You are a good man, and please don’t ever hesitate on posting because of what I or others might think. I always find humor and laughter here on your blog – it helps me a great deal. Yes, we are here to help others – thanks friend – Happy Friday.

When visiting Brian’s blog, I laugh a lot, I mean where I am holding my belly and laughing.  I have to hold my belly right now because I continue to be a little sore from surgery.  But the laughing is good for me and is great medicine for recovery.

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My friends, I am not offended by much and I appreciate we have a platform here to express our thoughts.

Brian’s sensitivity toward me and my struggles shows what a good man he is.  Thank you Brian and others for writing, posting and publishing your thoughts.  As Brian indicated in his response comment ‘We’re both here to help others get through the bigs and the smalls by trying to find the humor and the shared humanity in both.

I read many posts by other bloggers and find many different emotions from them.

And many of them I find the humor.

Happy Tuesday

It is not just Valentine’s Day‘, is a post I published a year ago today and it started with the following –

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Happy Valentine’s Day everyone, hope your day is a special one.

Today is a very special day for me, not only is it Valentine’s Day, it is also the birthday of my son #2.

He was born on this special day 32 years ago weighing in at 9lbs and 12 ½oz.  Yes, he was a big boy!

In today’s post, I write the following –

Yes, it is son #2’s birthday again – Happy 33rd Birthday Son

Yes, it is Valentine’s Day – Happy Valentine’s Day

For those that do not have a birthday today or celebrate Valentine’s Day –

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Happy Year

Today 1 year ago, my post started with the following –

Happy New Year Everyone!

As I start this New Year, I first wanted to say ‘Thank You’ to each and every one of you that read my blog.  When I started this a little over 7 months ago I really had no idea where it would take me.  Really I was at a point where I was not doing much in my life.  At that time I knew my extreme Christmas decorating was not going to take place, so I had time on my hands to do something else.  And with me retired and not working, I have time on my hands.  So, what should I do?  I have always had the idea of writing a book about my life, I felt for me that was important.  But, deep inside I knew that would most likely not occur as I consider myself not a writer – I do not know where to start in writing a book.

So there I was last year with time on my hands and wondering what I should be doing with my time.  I could start a blog about me and my life; and that is what I did.  Would anyone read my blog about me and my life?  Would anyone really care about those things in my life that brought me to here today and a new year?  But I am not a writer; would people read and criticize my writing?  Should I expose the true me and everything about me?

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In today’s post, I write the following –

Happy 2017 Everyone!

The first day of 2016, I had no knowledge of what that year would bring.

The first day of 2017, I have some knowledge of what this year will bring.

I never write words that are not the truth and I never pretend to be something I am not.

This blog, my blog is about me and my life; my thinking, my emotions, my feelings, my experiences, and events that shape me.

I am privileged to have a platform to write and express me.

I am privileged to have a platform to read and comprehend you.

I write often ‘I appreciate you’, ‘Happy Day’ in posts and comments.

I do not have other words to describe my feelings for you who read my posts.

I will never have words that exactly describe my feelings for the support I receive here.

My wish is each of you have a year full happiness and whatever the journey you are on, that you never give up hope.

I will continue to write and post and I certainly will never give up hope.

I appreciate you, truly I do – happy year my friends.

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…just listen

…just listen

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Just listen to my words, they have purpose, they have a way with them in describing someone, something, an occurrence, an event, a moment, a feeling, an emotion.

I do not want judgement, I do not desire compassion, I do not need understanding.  Just hear, just listen to the words.  I want to be a better person and to have a better life.  Just listen to my words.

I just need to express, I need to let out, I need to put the information out there and get it out of my head.  Let it be express and let the words be read.  This is my mind, my complex thinking of many thoughts and many emotions; and though it may be complicated, sometimes simple, sometimes difficult to understand and to comprehend, to calculate.

It is sane and happy many times, but other times can be insane and unhappy.

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Am I different from everyone else – just like everyone else is different from me?

This is my life…just listen to my words.

…just listen